Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Things I Don't Understand #2

The Glasses Makeover.

I know I discussed glasses last time.

It's just that this one really gets me.

Let's begin our movie with a mildly successful young woman who is wearing glasses and possibly has frumpy hair. She is single and lonely, but probably has some endearing qualities that make you wonder why every guy in sight treats her like a toad. At some point during this movie she is going to experience a "glasses makeover" and obtain contacts, an attractive and loving partner, and a raise.

That's because our heroine was obviously too boring and uncomely to deserve good things when she has *cue gasp* GLASSES (oh the horror).

Alternately, we have Clark Kent. Everybody knows who Superman is. He's awesome. He's got super powers. He can FLY. But if this same person is wearing glasses, well, no one would suspect such an unassuming and unprepossessing man to be anyone special. But when he takes those specs off... SUPERMAN!

Generally my reaction to that moment goes something like this:

lol ok this is an exaggeration
Because come on, Hollywood, take off your hipster frames and see the light. Glasses are AWESOME and I don't want the heroine to get contacts just so that people will realize she's the most gorgeous person ever. I like my glasses, and I don't feel prettier when I take them off.

Here I shall list several reasons why glasses are great:

1. This is obvious, but come on. It's an accessory. FOR YOUR FACE.

2. Have you ever just not wanted to pluck your eyebrows? Never fear! Your glasses frames will cover up those pesky hairs!
Or lack thereof! Mr. Quinto's eyebrows have been partially shaved to accommodate his Vulcan makeup. But you wouldn't know if I hadn't told you!

3. They help you see! I know contacts do that as well, but I think glasses are cooler. They were invented first and without them, some of use would wander around like this.
lol where am I guys

So in closing I just can't understand the "glasses makeover" that some films feel necessary. I know there are much worse forms of discrimination out there but give a little love to my bespectacled brethren! 


Rebekah Jones said...

power to the glasses people.

i feel awesome in my glasses and i know men think librarians are hot, so....


Goldberry said...

I agree. Though in my particular case, I think I have a complex about having something breakable right next to my eyes... but maybe that's a carryover from being seven and falling and scratching not only my face and arms, but also scratching and cracking my ONE AND ONLY pair of glasses that cost a lot to purchase (and repurchase), that took three weeks to have redone and without which I was blind and headachey. *breathes in brown paper bag*

See. Complex.

But seriously. I think my face looks MORE attractive with glasses. If I can *twitch* get over having GLASS near my *twitch* EYEBALLS then I might end up using them again (regularly). Or if I can for some reason no longer obtain contact lenses in my measurements... because they have to special order them for the half-way-to-legally-blind. But I digress.

I agree with your original statement. In other news, have you been watching My Big Fat Greek Wedding?

Rachel Heffington said...

Haha! Yay for glasses! I personally look better in contacts, but I think lots of people look great in their goggles. ;)